Vermont's Independent Voice
Browse News
Browse Arts + Culture
Browse Food + Drink
Browse Cannabis
Browse Music
Browse On Screen
Browse Events
Browse Classifieds
Browse Personals
Monday, April 3, 2017
Joke of the Week Joke of the Week: Murder, He Wrote
Posted
By Dan Bolles
on Mon, Apr 3, 2017 at 10:12 AM
It's Monday, which means it's time for your weekly dose of locavore levity: the Joke of the Week! This week's joke comes from Burlington's Kendall Farrell. Take it away, Kendall…
Farrell hosts Comedy & Crépes every Monday at the Skinny Pancake in Burlington. He hosts LGBTQ LOL: A Queer Comedy Showcase on Wednesday, April 5, at Vermont Comedy Club in Burlington. On Wednesday, April 12, he cohosts the political comedy show United We Standup with special guest, Seven Days political editor Paul Heintz, also at VCC.
I have a great good person test: When you watch crime shows, do you worry about getting murdered? Or do you worry about getting caught murdering somebody?
Are you sitting there thinking, Well, I guess I'm never going camping alone again. Or, are you sitting there like, Well, I'd remove all his teeth, that's what I'd do. They'd never catch me."
Are you sitting there thinking, Well, I guess I'm never going camping alone again. Or, are you sitting there like, Well, I'd remove all his teeth, that's what I'd do. They'd never catch me."
About That Joke
Says Farrell: Watching a ton of crime shows made me realize that I'm maybe a terrible person. I've been working on this joke for probably about a year now. I do a much longer version when I'm onstage.Meet the Comedian, Kendall Farrell
Kendall Farrell is a Burlington-based comedian. He was the 2015 winner of the Vermont’s Funniest Comedian competition at the Vermont Comedy Club and a 2016 finalist for the Seven Daysies ‘Best Standup Comic,’ a reader’s choice award.
See Him Live
Farrell hosts Comedy & Crépes every Monday at the Skinny Pancake in Burlington. He hosts LGBTQ LOL: A Queer Comedy Showcase on Wednesday, April 5, at Vermont Comedy Club in Burlington. On Wednesday, April 12, he cohosts the political comedy show United We Standup with special guest, Seven Days political editor Paul Heintz, also at VCC.Think you can do better?
We're always looking for jokes from local comedians. We publish one joke each week, and you can read through previous ones here.
Comments
Comments are closed.
Since 2014, Seven Days has allowed readers to comment on all stories posted on our website. While we’ve appreciated the suggestions and insights, the time has come to shut them down — at least temporarily.
While we champion free speech, facts are a matter of life and death during the coronavirus pandemic, and right now Seven Days is prioritizing the production of responsible journalism over moderating online debates between readers.
To criticize, correct or praise our reporting, please send us a letter to the editor. Or send us a tip. We’ll check it out and report the results.
Online comments may return when we have better tech tools for managing them. Thanks for reading.
Related Locations
-
The Skinny Pancake (Burlington)
- 60 Lake St., Burlington Burlington VT 05401
-
802-540-0188
- www.skinnypancake.com
-
Vermont Comedy Club
- 101 Main St., Burlington Burlington VT 05401
-
802-859-0100
- vermontcomedyclub.com
Related Stories
About The Author
Dan Bolles
Bio:
Dan Bolles is Seven Days' assistant arts editor and also edits What's Good, the annual city guide to Burlington. He has received numerous state, regional and national awards for his coverage of the arts, music, sports and culture. He loves dogs, dark beer and the Boston Red Sox.
Dan Bolles is Seven Days' assistant arts editor and also edits What's Good, the annual city guide to Burlington. He has received numerous state, regional and national awards for his coverage of the arts, music, sports and culture. He loves dogs, dark beer and the Boston Red Sox.
More By This Author
About the Artist
Michael Tonn
Bio:
Michael Tonn is still just eating gummy bears outside the Shopping Bag in Burlington. To see more of his work and to get in touch, go to michaeltonn.com or @dead_moons on Instagram.
Michael Tonn is still just eating gummy bears outside the Shopping Bag in Burlington. To see more of his work and to get in touch, go to michaeltonn.com or @dead_moons on Instagram.
