Moment of Clarity? 

Dear Mistress Maeve,

Two weeks ago, my live-in boyfriend of almost a year went out for a night of drinking (unusual for him) and didn't come home until the next evening, and only to tell me he was leaving me and moving out. He says he still loves me, but he had "a moment of clarity" that night and knows that I am "not The One." How can one "know" something like that when even he admits he had no idea anything was wrong until that night of binge drinking, but now he can "never go back"? Even though he says he loves me more than he's ever loved anyone, he refuses to put any effort into fixing the relationship or even hoping for it to work itself out in time.

Then, today, I caught him in our room (even though it's mine now, and he has moved out) masturbating to photos of me and using my underwear.

What am I supposed to make of all this? Is there a chance this relationship could be salvaged?

Sincerely,

Dumped Drawers

-------------------------------

Dear Drawers,

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but your boy is not being honest with you. People don't think a relationship is hunky-dory one day and then decide to end it after a 24-hour date with Jose Cuervo. Perhaps your guy was having doubts about your relationship and needed a little liquid courage to end it?

As for him unloading in your undies - he can't have it both ways. He said goodbye to you and your panties when he walked out the door, so you must demand that he stop using your underwear as a spankerchief. Perhaps the quickest way to get him back (if you really want him) is to set strong boundaries and give him a taste of being alone with only his own tighty-whities to comfort him.

No visible panty lines,

MM