Fishing for Answers | Mistress Maeve | Seven Days | Vermont's Independent Voice

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Fishing for Answers 

Mistress Maeve

Published June 10, 2009 at 4:41 p.m.

Dear Mistress Maeve,

As you've alluded to many times, Burlington is a small place where everyone seems to know one another, making the dating scene tricky. I recently experienced an awkward Burlington dating scenario, and I would love to get your take on it.

I had been out on a couple dates with this guy, and things seemed promising. Obviously, we hadn't had any talk about exclusivity yet, so I wasn't really surprised when I saw him out at a restaurant with another woman I know casually. I didn't care that he was out with another girl, but I felt stressed out because I didn't know what to do or say. I ended up ignoring him completely, not wanting to make the situation any more awkward. However, it felt strange not to walk up and say hello, like I would do with any other friends. It was really uncomfortable - how should I have handled it?


Dating Decorum


Dear D.D.,

I applaud your calm attitude toward dating. Some people would be upset by seeing their new love interest out on the town with someone else, but that's how dating goes - sometimes you have to cast a wide net to catch that special fish. The problem is, in a town like Burlington, the fishing pond is only so big.

You were right not to approach their table - given the circumstances, it would be weird for you to make a cameo appearance on their date. However, I would have gone with a casual wave and a smile in their direction at an opportune moment. The nonchalant acknowledgment of their presence shows your confidence and grace under pressure, while completely ignoring them could wrongly indicate to him that you're jealous or angry.

Gone Fishing,


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About The Author

Mistress Maeve

Mistress Maeve

Mistress Maeve wrote a weekly advice column on love and lust from September 2007 until January 2014.


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