Got Gnomes? | News | Seven Days | Vermont's Independent Voice

Seven Days needs your financial support!

Got Gnomes? 

I'm hoping someone out there can clear up a little mystery for me.

On Saturday, while I was happily putting my half-price coupon for a mani/pedi at Mirror Mirror to use in downtown Burlington, someone stuck a little lime-green card under the windshield wiper on my car. (It looks yellow here, but whatever.) Spotting it upon my return, and thinking it might be yet another coupon to bolster someone's January-thin business, I snatched the card curiously.

But no. As you can see here, the paper depicted a little pointy-hatted, white-bearded (do they come any other way?) gnome leaning against what appears to be a cut tree trunk, with the imperative message "Don't Mess with Gnomes!"

Now, had I recently been messing with gnomes, I would have a considered this a sinister threat, and also wondered, Who knew I was messing with gnomes? But as I had long ago given up gnomes for ... um, sock monkeys, all I could think was: New local band? Great name!

Or, wait, was it an aptly tiny flyer for the upcoming movie Gnomeo and Juliet? I hoped not, cuz that film looks unbearable. (But in case you're interested, James McAvoy and Emily Blunt voice the star-crossed and inexplicably animated garden statuary. Sheesh.)

But I digress. The thought did also occur that "gnomes" are something sexual that I've never heard of, but I'm not going with that. Instead, I'd love it if someone could just help me out here. Hello?

One or more images has been removed from this article. For further information, contact web@sevendaysvt.com.
Got something to say? Send a letter to the editor and we'll publish your feedback in print!

Tags: ,

About The Author

Pamela Polston

Pamela Polston

Bio:
Pamela Polston is the cofounder, coeditor and associate publisher of Seven Days. In 2015, she was inducted into the New England Newspaper Hall of Fame.

Comments (22)

Showing 1-10 of 22

 

Comments are closed.

Since 2014, Seven Days has allowed readers to comment on all stories posted on our website. While we’ve appreciated the suggestions and insights, the time has come to shut them down — at least temporarily.

While we champion free speech, facts are a matter of life and death during the coronavirus pandemic, and right now Seven Days is prioritizing the production of responsible journalism over moderating online debates between readers.

To criticize, correct or praise our reporting, please send us a letter to the editor. Or send us a tip. We’ll check it out and report the results.

Online comments may return when we have better tech tools for managing them. Thanks for reading.

Keep up with us Seven Days a week!

Sign up for our fun and informative
newsletters:

All content © 2020 Da Capo Publishing, Inc. 255 So. Champlain St. Ste. 5, Burlington, VT 05401  |  Contact Us
Website powered by Foundation