GreenMountainMensch | Seven Days | Vermont's Independent Voice

Member since Jan 18, 2017



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Re: “Another Holiday Passes, and No Proposal

This describes my situation nearly to a T, minus the "He talks about getting married all the time..." bits. In my case -- speaking as the reluctant boyfriend -- it isn't simply a matter of money precluding nuptials, but some strong, unresolved issues in the underlying relationship that won't go away simply by one party proposing. Unmet needs and unresolved traumas co-conspiring to prevent either party from experiencing true happiness or fulfillment in each other's arms.

That, of course, runs up against societal expectations of where one *SHOULD* be at that point in a relationship.

But should one get married simply because social norms dictate that it's the thing to do? It would seem more prudent to hash things out before the fact than to simply slide into marital malaise and deal with the divorce courts later on down the line.

All of which is to say, it's not always so simple as just popping *THE* question when it may be one among many in need of an answer.

Posted by GreenMountainMensch on 01/18/2017 at 9:24 PM

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