I'm Attracted to Men Physically, But Not Romantically. Am I Gay? | Ask the Rev. | Seven Days | Vermont's Independent Voice

Seven Days needs your financial support!

I'm Attracted to Men Physically, But Not Romantically. Am I Gay? 

click to enlarge ID 77729316 © SEBOS | DREAMSTIME.COM

Dear Reverend,

I'm not attracted to blokes one bit. But I love a nice cock — so much so that I do let guys fuck me, and I don't mind sucking them off. But no way would I kiss a guy. Am I gay?

Doodle Doo (male, 35)

Dear Doodle Doo,

Every year on Saint Patrick's Day, millions of people wear green, get drunk and listen to Celtic music. Does that make them all Irish? Nope. A similar concept applies to sex. A heterosexual person can engage in homosexual activities without identifying as gay. It doesn't mean that they're closeted, either.

Romantic attraction and sexual attraction are two different things. You can be sexually attracted to men and women but only have feelings of romantic attraction and love toward women. No big whoop. Of course, you should be honest with all parties involved, or else you could find yourself in a real sticky wicket.

If you're 35 and you have to ask whether you're gay, maybe there's more to it. But as long as everyone is a consenting adult and having a good time, why bother with labels? Not all people are able to be as free and fluid with their sexuality as it sounds like you are, so consider yourself a lucky fella and keep on keepin' on.

Good luck and God bless,

The Reverend

Fill out my online form.
Got something to say? Send a letter to the editor and we'll publish your feedback in print!

More By This Author

About The Author

The Reverend

What's your problem? Need some irreverent counsel on life's conundrums? You can always just "Ask the Rev."


Comments are closed.

Since 2014, Seven Days has allowed readers to comment on all stories posted on our website. While we’ve appreciated the suggestions and insights, the time has come to shut them down — at least temporarily.

While we champion free speech, facts are a matter of life and death during the coronavirus pandemic, and right now Seven Days is prioritizing the production of responsible journalism over moderating online debates between readers.

To criticize, correct or praise our reporting, please send us a letter to the editor. Or send us a tip. We’ll check it out and report the results.

Online comments may return when we have better tech tools for managing them. Thanks for reading.

Latest in Ask the Rev.

Keep up with us Seven Days a week!

Sign up for our fun and informative

All content © 2022 Da Capo Publishing, Inc. 255 So. Champlain St. Ste. 5, Burlington, VT 05401
Advertising Policy  |  Contact Us
Website powered by Foundation