I'm Uncomfortable When My Dad and His Girlfriend Are Affectionate | Ask the Rev. | Seven Days | Vermont's Independent Voice
Pin It

I'm Uncomfortable When My Dad and His Girlfriend Are Affectionate 

click to enlarge rev1-2-21f233d1f549be33.jpg

Dear Reverend,

My mother passed away in 2016. My father met a woman about six months ago, and they've gotten pretty serious. She's nice, but whenever they're together, they're really affectionate, and it makes me uncomfortable. They're going to be staying at my house a few days for Christmas, and I'm not sure how I feel about them sleeping in the same bed. What's the etiquette?

Daddy's Girl (woman, 43)

Dear Daddy's Girl,

He's your father, but it's your house, so if it makes you unbearably uncomfortable, you could certainly ask him to stay at a hotel. But it's Christmastime, and that seems way too "no room at the inn" to me.

For the first 40 years of your life, you only knew your father as your mother's husband, so of course seeing him being romantic with a different woman will seem strange to you. That's perfectly normal, but you need to work on getting over it.

Your mother wouldn't have wanted him to be alone forever, and neither should you. Imagine how you'd feel if he were with a woman who was mean to him all the time. That would be a whole lot worse, wouldn't it? Some people never find love at all, so be thankful that your father has found it again.

If you're close enough with your dad, just be really honest with him. Let him know that you like his new lady but you feel awkward when they're displaying affection, and it's going to take you some time to get used to it. Getting this off your chest ought to make you more comfortable with them snuggling up with sugarplum fairies under your roof.

Good luck and God bless,

The Reverend

Fill out my online form.

Did you appreciate this story?

Show us your ❤️ by becoming a Seven Days Super Reader.

Got something to say? Send a letter to the editor and we'll publish your feedback in print!

Pin It

More by The Reverend

About The Author

The Reverend


Subscribe to this thread:

Add a comment

Seven Days moderates comments in order to ensure a civil environment. Please treat the comments section as you would a town meeting, dinner party or classroom discussion. In other words, keep commenting classy! Read our guidelines...

Note: Comments are limited to 300 words.

Latest in Ask the Rev.

recent comments

Keep up with us Seven Days a week!

Sign up for our fun and informative

All content © 2020 Da Capo Publishing, Inc. 255 So. Champlain St. Ste. 5, Burlington, VT 05401
Website powered by Foundation