New Year's Resolutions for Love and Lust | Mistress Maeve | Seven Days | Vermont's Independent Voice
Pin It

New Year's Resolutions for Love and Lust 

Mistress Maeve: Your guide to love and lust...

Dear Readers,

Read any magazines or blogs this week and you’re likely to find an array of top-10 lists — from the best books and movies to the biggest news stories of 2012. As you’re finishing holiday leftovers and stocking up on champagne to ring in the new year, I encourage you to make some lists of your own. What were your top orgasms from the past 12 months? Top dates, romantic moments, kisses and sexual positions?

As you reflect on the year, be grateful for the love and lust you’ve experienced — and don’t forget to include pleasure in your 2013 resolutions. I assure you, a resolution to have more sex will be easier (and more fun) to keep than going to the gym.

If you’re not sure what kind of sex resolutions to make, here are a few suggestions:

  • Watch “you” porn. So many people let physical insecurities get in the way of fantastic sex. Whether you’re self-conscious about your weight, age or penis size, the truth is, lots of people are attracted to you. To prove it, search for your body type on an amateur porn website such as or and marvel at the long list of results. I challenge you not only to watch this porn but get off on it. You are hot and you deserve to see people just like you giving and receiving pleasure.
  • Make out more. This isn’t the first time you’ve heard me give this advice (and it won’t be the last). Couples always ask me how to keep things exciting. I recommend going back to high school, when making out and dry humping were the ingredients for a perfect Saturday night. Sex can become routine — to make it exciting again, go back to the beginning and start with a kiss.
  • Masturbate more. The most important sexual relationship you have is with yourself. To know thyself is to be able to share more fully with your partners. So get busy solo!

And, don’t forget — if your love life gives you lemons in 2013, send your questions to me at We’ll make some lemonade.

Happy New Year,

Did you appreciate this story?

Show us your ❤️ by becoming a Seven Days Super Reader.

Got something to say? Send a letter to the editor and we'll publish your feedback in print!

Pin It

More by Mistress Maeve

About The Author

Mistress Maeve

Mistress Maeve

Mistress Maeve wrote a weekly advice column on love and lust from September 2007 until January 2014.


Subscribe to this thread:

Add a comment

Seven Days moderates comments in order to ensure a civil environment. Please treat the comments section as you would a town meeting, dinner party or classroom discussion. In other words, keep commenting classy! Read our guidelines...

Note: Comments are limited to 300 words.

Latest in Category

Social Club

Keep up with us Seven Days a week!

Sign up for our fun and informative

All content © 2018 Da Capo Publishing, Inc. 255 So. Champlain St. Ste. 5, Burlington, VT 05401
Website powered by Foundation