Offline Endeavors | Mistress Maeve | Seven Days | Vermont's Independent Voice

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Offline Endeavors 

Mistress Maeve

Published December 9, 2009 at 2:39 p.m.

Dear Mistress,

I'm a single woman living in Montpelier, where everyone is either married or undatable. As such, I've all but given up on eyeing people in the bars or striking up conversations in the local bookstore; it's a fruitless effort.

However, I've recently seen a guy around town who I recognize from his profile on an online dating site. I'm not a paid member, so I can't contact him via the site. I'm wondering if it would be weird and/or stalker-like for me to approach him in public and say, "Hello. I've seen you online and like your profile"?




Dear Offline,

Living in a small rural state like Vermont, finding a mate can be an arduous task. Single, eligible people can seem few and far between - plus, you're severely screwed if you're not into composting, snowboarding or hiking Camel's Hump every weekend. To successfully date in the 802, you must treat it as a no-holds-barred cage match, making connections wherever you can - including approaching your mystery man on the streets of Montpelier. If he's posting photos of himself online and proclaiming to the world that he's single and ready to mingle, he shouldn't be surprised or offended if someone approaches him face to face.

But, before your motherboard interfaces with his hard drive, take a fresh look at his profile. Check to see he's been active on the site within the past month - you don't want to be referencing a profile he hasn't updated since 2006. Also, be sure you fit the description of the mate he's looking for - you don't want to waste his time or yours.

And, I hate to point out the obvious, but if you're having a hard time meeting people around town but finding attractive singles online, shouldn't you consider posting your own profile?

Yours in rural dating,


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About The Author

Mistress Maeve

Mistress Maeve

Mistress Maeve wrote a weekly advice column on love and lust from September 2007 until January 2014.


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