Scarlett Letters: The Summer Long-Distance Romance Conundrum | Scarlett Letters | Seven Days | Vermont's Independent Voice

Seven Days needs your financial support!

Scarlett Letters: The Summer Long-Distance Romance Conundrum 

Published May 30, 2018 at 10:00 a.m.

click to enlarge scarlett1-1-07dbb6220e840cc2.jpg

Dear Readers,

Lately I have received letters from college freshmen concerned about how their romantic relationships will fare over the summer break. Some of them plan to study abroad or do an internship in a new city. Others plan to go home but are worried because their partner's hometown isn't close by. "Should we just break up?" one of them asked. "What if one person wants to keep dating over the summer and the other wants their freedom?"


Summer Lovers (female freshmen, 18, 19)

Dear Summer Lovers,

For college students in romantic relationships, summer can present a real conundrum. You'll no longer be just a dorm away or see each other regularly in class. So keeping the feels going will take more effort. You might wonder: Is it worth it?

There are inherent risks in parting ways. Sometimes absence does not make the heart grow fonder. It's easy to get jealous when exes resurface and you're not included in what's going on. Studying abroad poses other challenges. One of you will be in a whirlwind of new experiences, while the other will not. You won't even be in the same time zone.

If maintaining and even strengthening your bond is what you both want, however, communication is key. (As always!) Establish boundaries and expectations before you go on break. Respect the fact that your partner had a life before you, and don't get jealous when she or he hangs out with old friends. Give each other the benefit of the doubt.

If possible, plan a trip to visit each other. Otherwise, stay on the radar by making each other part of your week or day. There are so many ways to stay in touch: texting, FaceTime, instant messaging and the good old telephone. You could also set up Skype dates or plan to watch the same movie, read the same book or gaze at the same full moon.

But staying in regular touch doesn't mean talking every minute, and overdoing it might come across as clingy. Even if you obsess over your sweetheart more than you'd care to admit, stay cool and enjoy the break. Summer is short. Try to make it sweet!



Fill out my online form.
Got something to say? Send a letter to the editor and we'll publish your feedback in print!

About The Author



Comments are closed.

From 2014-2020, Seven Days allowed readers to comment on all stories posted on our website. While we've appreciated the suggestions and insights, right now Seven Days is prioritizing our core mission — producing high-quality, responsible local journalism — over moderating online debates between readers.

To criticize, correct or praise our reporting, please send us a letter to the editor or send us a tip. We’ll check it out and report the results.

Online comments may return when we have better tech tools for managing them. Thanks for reading.

Keep up with us Seven Days a week!

Sign up for our fun and informative

All content © 2023 Da Capo Publishing, Inc. 255 So. Champlain St. Ste. 5, Burlington, VT 05401

Advertising Policy  |  Privacy Policy  |  Contact Us  |  About Us  |  Help
Website powered by Foundation