Totally NOT Welcome | Culture | Seven Days | Vermont's Independent Voice
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Totally NOT Welcome 

“What’s Good” is just one of the cooler cousins on the outskirts of the “what’s up” family tree. Close relatives include “what’s goody,” “what’s goodington” and “what it is yo.” No relation to “you good?”

“What’s Good” applies to a lot in the Queen City. But one thing that’s never going to be good is the relationship between the hordes of UVM students that descend upon B-Town come August and the year-long residents who don’t always take kindly to our arrival. I mean, I don’t know why Mrs. Hardass who lives on College Street has problems with inebriated frat pledges urinating on her petunias at 2:30 in the morning. Or why Mr. Weaksause of Hungerford Terrace feels the need to rudely intrude upon the small intimate gatherings of, say, 85 close friends across the street by phoning the 5-0.

But no matter what their lame reasons may be, students who live and travel off-campus will find that these people (UVM Community Relations adorably calls them “UVM Neighbors”) aren’t too quick in dispatching the welcome wagon. In fact, as Mike Ives reports in this week’s Seven Days, City officials have been trying to work for a decade to limit Catamounts from descending down the hill. It’s a cool little article — definitely worth reading.

I don’t know where they get the nerve to try and hold us at bay on campus. Don’t our UVM neighbors know that underage drinking, smoking, gathering in large numbers, and excessive noise are all prohibited up in those jail-cell dorms? Don’t they care about our needs?

But now you’ll have to excuse me. It’s getting late, and there’s fifty people in my backyard who want some music to rock to. Maybe I’ll idle my car in the street and treat my new neighbors to some old-school gangsta rap. Now that’s what’s good.

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