Dear Reverend,
My roommate and I have lived together for almost two years, and we’ve become great friends. Our place allows pets, but neither one of us had one when we moved in. Lately, he’s been talking about wanting to get a puppy. I love dogs, and I’m open to the idea, but my roommate isn’t the most responsible person in the world. I don’t want to tell him he can’t do it, but I really don’t want to wind up taking care of the puppy all of the time. How can I support his decision without ruining my living situation?
Pet Project (man, 37)
Dear Pet Project,
It’s fantastic that you don’t want to rain on your roomie’s puppy parade, but you are right to be worried about the responsibility factor. Bringing a puppy into a home affects everyone in it, so the two of you need to have a serious house meeting about the idea.
Before you have the discussion, make a list of all your concerns. Decide how much or how little you are willing to be involved in the raising of the puppy: housebreaking, walks, feeding, pet sitting, financial contribution and so on. You have to set firm boundaries and be sure that you will be able to stick to them.
It’s a tough topic, but the two of you should also talk about what happens if things go south. How will behavioral issues be handled? What if the puppy chews up your favorite shoes? What if he barks all the time? What if you get really attached to the dog and your roommate decides to move? Think of any possible problems and discuss the solutions.
Your roommate needs to understand that a puppy is going to be a lot of work — for him. You may even want to suggest that he look into adopting an older dog that has gotten past the puppy phase. Goodness knows there are plenty of them out there who need a home. Either way, you may want to ask to be involved in the selection process, since you also have to live with the new pet.
Hopefully all goes well and you wind up having another, possibly furrier, roommate with whom you will be great friends.
Good luck and God bless,
The Reverend
This article appears in Aug 13-19, 2025.
