Dear Reverend,
I have a housemate who moved into my apartment four months ago. He pays his rent on time. He’s quiet. He doesn’t leave a mess in the kitchen. He’s great. Except for one thing: He flosses his teeth while we’re watching TV in the living room! It grosses me out so much; I can’t take it. How do I approach the subject without upsetting him? I don’t want him to move out.
Mortified Moe (man, 26)
Dear Mortified Moe,
I guess it’s good he feels comfortable around you, but flossing your teeth is right up there with cutting your toenails on my List of Things Not to Do in the Living Room — even in the presence of a significant other. I mean, c’mon! You gotta keep the mystery alive and draw the line somewhere. Nobody needs to see another person’s tooth juice flying around the room.
If you don’t nip a little peeve in the bud, it can quickly blossom into a bigger problem. It will be much easier to confront the situation now than if you let it fester.
Find a time to talk to him, but don’t make it a big deal. Start off by complimenting him on all the ways he’s been a great housemate so far. Then tell him that you have a “thing” about teeth and would appreciate it if he’d floss in the bathroom. (It’s an easy out to blame a pet peeve on a generic “thing” that you have. People don’t usually ask questions.)
Your housemate sounds like a decent person, so I bet approaching him won’t be as uncomfortable as you imagine. He’ll probably appreciate that you let him know. And in this housing market, I don’t think being asked to floss in private would cause anybody to move out.
Good luck and God bless,
The Reverend
This article appears in Apr 12-18, 2023.
