With
profound sadness and grief, we share that Sally Ginsberg Tannen died
from lung cancer at the age of 69. Sally was the warmest, kindest and
most universally beloved person we knew. We are devastated that she
left us too soon and grateful we were able to spend her final days
holding her hands and telling her how much we loved her.
She
leaves behind her husband, Arnie; sister, Anne; children, Michael,
Rob, Jon and Elizabeth; and grandchildren, Grace, Stella, Nora,
Cedar, Shepard, Ralph and Shirley.
Until
recently, Sally was a lifelong New Yorker: She grew up in a Midtown
East apartment with Anne and parents Susan and Stephen; their
cousins, Mary and Nina, who happened to be the same age, lived next
door. According to Mary, Sally was “the nicest of us four — the
warmest and shiniest.” She and Anne attended the (now shuttered)
New Lincoln School, where she was introduced to the values of
progressive education that shaped her almost-50-year career in the
field.
Sally
knew from an early age that she wanted to teach and received her
master’s in early childhood from Bank Street College of Education
in New York after majoring in English at Washington University in St.
Louis.
Despite
her deceptively mild demeanor, she had a lifelong passion for
adventure. During college she led groups of young people on hiking
and biking tours through the Alps, and her favorite part of school
was the time she spent living with a family in rural England. During
the 43 years she and Arnie were married, they enjoyed abundant travel
together.
In
her mid-twenties, while teaching first grade at Village Community
School, lifelong friends of her parents — Margie and Peter Rogatz —
set her up on a blind date with our dad, Arnie, recently widowed and
the father of three young boys. A year later, they were married. By
all accounts, everyone who knew Sally thought it was a crazy
undertaking and that if anyone could handle it, it was her. They were
right about both. A few years later, they had a daughter. Sally
brought life, light and nurturing to the family.
So
that she could work part time and spend more of her days being a mom,
she stepped back from teaching and pivoted to admissions, a role she
held at several downtown schools before stepping into a new challenge
as director of the Parenting Center at the 92nd Street Y, where she
stayed for 20 years and from where she eventually (mostly) retired.
She hosted podcasts such as “You Got This” and “Ask Sally
Tannen,” dispensing advice on all areas of parenting. Sally was
known as a “legend” and “the baby guru” at the Y. Her
favorite activity was running a regular drop-in group for new moms,
who marveled at her ability to calm the fussiest of babies. (They
reluctantly obeyed her only rule: no hot coffee near the babies!) She
also loved leading a class on grandparenting and continued to do so
virtually as recently as last month.
Sally
was a true host: She expressed her love through physical affection
and food, traits she shared with her husband. Together, they loved to
have family and friends over for holidays and dinners and eat at
their favorite restaurants (for years, every Friday evening at the
Gramercy Tavern bar). She had the ability to prepare
restaurant-quality food without recipes or apparent effort and to
make everyone that crossed her path feel warmly welcomed.
In
2021, she and Arnie moved from New York City to Shelburne, Vt., to
pursue their retirement dream of leaving “the city” and enjoying
“the country.” There, Sally found another dream job arranging
flowers at the Inn at Shelburne Farms. She delighted in cultivating a
home flower and vegetable garden, enjoying Vermont’s spectacular
scenery, building community with new neighbors and friends, and —
most of all — hosting her seven grandchildren.
Sally
was most devoted to her role as grandmother, or “Gigi.” From bath
time to making Play-Doh to reading and more reading, she did
everything she could to be a playmate and caretaker for the little
ones whom she adored and who adored her back. Her love for literature
fostered the imaginations of her grandchildren, and for that we will
be forever grateful. We wish more than anything that she could have
had more time with them.
Arnie
speaks of Sally (his “bride”) as the best thing that’s ever
happened to him, and none of us expected him to outlive her. It
rocked our world when she received a diagnosis of stage IV lung
cancer in December 2022; we’re fortunate that she stayed mostly
healthy and free from the cancer’s effects until her last weeks.
We
welcome your warm wishes and thoughts as we grieve this terrible
loss. If you want to make a donation in Sally’s name, Arnie invites
you to do so to the Cancer Center at the University of Vermont Medical Center.
This article appears in May 15-21, 2024.