Dear Reverend,
I just found out through Facebook that an old friend of mine has cancer and the outlook isn’t good. We were really close in college, but life happened and we lost touch. I want to reach out, but I’m sure she has a lot going on, and I don’t know what to say. Should I just let it go?
Emmy Tulate (woman, 45)
Dear Emmy Tulate,
Honey, have I got a story for you.
My late husband found out he had skin cancer when he was 48, and he died less than three months after he turned 51.
Not that long after he was diagnosed, an old friend of his from high school caught wind of the situation and got in touch. They hadn’t seen each other in many, many years. They talked on the phone, and it was like no time had passed. My husband’s buddy even came from out of state to visit while they could still have some fun, reconnect and reminisce. It wasn’t a grand gesture, but it meant the world to both of them.
The same thing might not happen with you and your old pal, but you’ll never know unless you try. If your gut is telling you to reach out, do it now. Right now, not tomorrow. Time is of the essence.
Send a message on Facebook. If your friend doesn’t answer there, you must know someone who can help you get in touch more directly. I’m sure you can rustle up a phone number or address. You don’t need to think too hard about what to say or try to be profound — just say a simple hello and that you’re thinking of her. Even if that’s as far as it goes, that’s great.
It may feel a little uncomfortable to take the first step, but you will feel a whole lot worse if you miss what might be your last chance to talk to an old friend.
Good luck and God bless,
The Reverend
This article appears in May 17-23, 2023.
