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Dear Reverend,

My mother died last year. She lived a great, long life, but of course I still miss her very much. Now, every time my sister sees a cardinal, she gets excited and says it’s mom sending a message. I don’t really understand why, as our mother wasn’t particularly fond of birds. I’m actually a bit jealous, because I wish I could believe seeing a bird was a sign from my mom, but I just don’t. Is it possible to change my mind?

Bird Brain (woman, 56)


Dear Bird Brain,

Brightly colored birds have been seen as spiritual messengers since ancient times. And around these parts, cardinals are about as eye-poppingly plumed as birds get.

Unlike many songbirds, cardinals don’t migrate. Their red feathers against a white winter background are a striking symbol of hope during hard times. They are also famously monogamous, making them a symbol of love. Combine all these things, and they help explain the widely held belief that a cardinal is a sign from the dearly departed. There’s even an old poem with the line “Cardinals appear when angels are near.”

You shouldn’t be jealous of your sister’s belief. If a bird doesn’t resonate with you as a message from your mother, you just need to find out what does.

This may sound a little woo-woo, but you could ask your mom to send you a sign. You can talk to her out loud or in your thoughts. Be specific, and ask for something unmistakable. It can be anything: an animal, an object, a color or a number. It could even be a scent or a song — as long as it’s something you’ll be sure to recognize.

It may not happen right away, but if you keep your mind open, I bet ya dollars to doughnuts your sign will appear. Especially at this time of year, when the veil between this world and the next is particularly thin.

Good luck and God bless,

The Reverend

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