Bacon. Sometimes called “the gateway meat” because when a vegetarian starts eating bacon, you know what’ll happen next. Sometimes just called “the best thing ever” because, well, it’s pretty damn delightful.

Here’s a collection of bacon-y treats:

~ A meaty scarf.
~ Another scarf.
~ A wallet that lets you bring home the bacon, no matter how much you earn
~ Gummy, strawberry flavored “bacon” strip candy
~ BLT-scented candles.
~ Bandages. You know how some people put a slab of steak on a black eye? Apparently it’s good to put bacon on a cut!
~ Blog.
~ Air Freshener. ‘Cuz there’s nothing like a bacon-scented room with no bacon in it to drive you crazy!
~ Crafts, and lots of ’em.

And finally, a stand-up comedy routine in which all the jokes are about…you guessed it…bacon!

https://youtube.com/watch?v=IVKJpkq-wNo%26rel%3D1

This article appears in Jan 16-22, 2008.

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Former contributor Suzanne Podhaizer is an award-winning food writer (and the first Seven Days food editor) as well as a chef, farmer, and food-systems consultant. She has given talks at the Stone Barns Center for Agriculture's "Poultry School" and its...