Emma Lara Nilan, age 38, beloved daughter, sister, aunt, cousin, friend, author and artist, passed away on April 4, 2023, surrounded by her parents, Kathy Lara and Clem Nilan, her sister Molly Nilan and dearest friend, Jessica Bridge.
Emma’s strength, resilience, compassion, loyalty, humor, grace and beauty are immeasurable. The heart is the universal symbol of love. She had three: her birth heart and two more via transplants. She displayed an incredible ability to listen without judgment, without planning her response and with a full and loving presence. She was steadfast in her resolve to fight against all odds and to squeeze more years, months, weeks, days and minutes out of this life than any of us could have predicted. We wished for a million more. She was always able to see the good in people under the most trying circumstances. She demonstrated laughter through tears, found humor in the everyday and true joy. Most of all, Emma overflowed with love for her parents, family and friends. Emma was extraordinary, and all who knew her are forever blessed by her grace and memory.
Emma’s north stars have always been love, kindness, creativity; finding awe in small things; the magic of her childhood, her family, pets and friends; the sharing of a good meal, art and music. In the last year of her life, Emma found great pride in training to be a recovery coach with the caring and generous community at The Turning Point. There, she built connections with others of like mind who were devoted to helping some of our community’s most vulnerable populations. Emma was surrounded and supported by a fellowship of humans where she learned to embrace the mantra to thine own self be true — and she lived it.
Emma is survived by her parents, Kathy Lara and Clement Nilan, of Burlington, and her sister, Molly Nilan, of Shelburne, with her husband, Ben, and their two children Ella, 12, and Jacob, 9. She was celebrated by a large and loving extended family in Vermont, New York, New Jersey and Washington. Emma grew up in Burlington and Shelburne with her sister and cousins, especially Chloe, Vanessa and Charlotte, and her dearly loved Aunt Janice and Uncle Ken. She was deeply connected to her closest friends, Jessica Bridge, Naomi Krasnow, Ali Marchildon, Isabel Epstein Gentry, Eva Antczak and Emily Korkosz, to name just a few. They were adored by Emma and will continue to be part of our family.
We extend a heartfelt thank you to the amazing and tireless medical professionals in Burlington and Boston, at Boston Children’s Hospital and Massachusetts General Hospital, who worked heroically in caring for Emma, despite extremely trying circumstances. Their extraordinary expertise and compassion enabled Emma to remain a bright light among us for over two decades. Emma spent much time in the medical facilities in both cities. The list of their names is our “Canyon of Heroes” and each is honored, particularly Dr. Karen Sokol, Dr. Jaina Clough, hospice nurse Carrie Steele, Dr. Adam Greenlee, Dr. Cindy Noyes, Dr. Peter Van Buren, Dr. Scott Yeager, Dr. Wendy Davis and the amazing team of physicians, nurses and staff at the University of Vermont McClure Miller Respite House in Colchester, where Drs. Nancy Long and Matthew Gervais worked with great compassion to help bring Emma home to spend her last days surrounded by her family and friends. We are forever grateful that Emma’s voice was heard and honored.
In lieu of flowers, Emma requested that you take as many moments as you can to pause and appreciate the beauty around us and to look at flowers and sunsets. During Emma’s last walks, she was thrilled by the snow crocuses. Emma loved dragonflies, forsythias, peonies and lilacs and wants you to remember her as they appear.
A celebration of life will be held at the Community Barn at the Intervale Center in Burlington on May 21 between the hours of 4-8 p.m. Please join us as we gather to share some good food and words, as we collectively remember the light of Emma.
Emma, you are free from pain and celebrated every minute. We adore you, sweet angel. Our beloved friend, Dave, from the Massachusetts General Cardiac Catheterization Lab wrote, “I will gain comfort from Dr. Seuss for now; ‘Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.’”
This article appears in Apr 12-18, 2023.
Dearest Emma,
What an incredible journey you had on this earth. It is a privilege to have been part of your MGH team. Words cannot ever express how much I cherish being your friend. Sending love and light to your family XOXO Steph
I met Emma within the last few weeks of her life – she was kindness and grace incarnate. I will always treasure the hug she gave me. I wish I had had the chance to meet her years ago, but I am grateful for the handful of moments we shared. She was a very special person.