Obituary: Peter Paul Lawlor Jr., MD, 1931-2023

It is with profound sadness that we announce the passing of our beloved father, husband and dear friend, Peter Paul Lawlor Jr., MD. Peter was born in Burlington, Vt., on May 16, 1931, to Peter Paul Lawlor Sr. and Marie (Boezinger) Lawlor. The youngest of three children, Peter attended Christ the King School, then La Salle Military Academy, before graduating from the University of Vermont, where he played football. He met and fell in love with Mary Newhall — a pretty nurse from the Northeast Kingdom — in summer 1956, and the two were married on October 12, 1957. After graduating from the University of Ottawa Medical School, Peter completed his residency in general ophthalmology at the National Naval Medical Center in Bethesda, Md., where he was taught by Marshall M. Parks, MD, along with Washington’s other ophthalmological elite. He completed his obligation to the U.S Navy at Camp Lejeune, then returned to Washington to complete a fellowship in pediatric ophthalmology, again with Marshall Parks, at Children’s National Hospital.

Peter felt that the eye needs of Vermont children were underrepresented, so in fall 1969 he settled in South Burlington with Mary and their five children. Peter was a charter member of the American Association for Pediatric Ophthalmology and practiced in Vermont for 37 years. He also served in the Vermont National Guard for many years and retired a lieutenant colonel.

Peter was a devoted and loving husband and was married to Mary for over 65 years. He was a passionate writer of love letters and would express his feelings with an eloquence and depth few ever saw. Mary saved every one of them. Peter was a dedicated father to his five children and introduced them to the outdoors at a very young age — encouraging them to embrace everything the Green Mountains had to offer. He was a great source of wisdom and was very generous with his time. When you spoke to him, he would stop what he was doing, giving you his full attention, listening patiently and without interruption. He was never judgmental and somehow always found the right words to bring comfort. He rarely expressed an opinion unsolicited, but if you were to ask, he wasn’t shy about telling you exactly how he felt. He was a wonderful travel companion and ignited a love of travel in his children. He would thoroughly research a trip months in advance and write out the itineraries on 3-by-5-inch index cards. He was an adoring grandfather and babysitter extraordinaire and could often be found enjoying his grandchildren’s cross-country races and hockey and soccer games.

If Peter’s first love was his family, his second love — without debate — was skiing. He skied the deep powder of Utah and the craggy peaks of the Bernese Oberland. But home was Stowe, Vt., where he skied for 74 years and well into his mid-eighties. Peter was no fair-weather skier and would ski in any climate or condition. A master of understatement, if the mountain were a sheet of ice he’d warn, “It could be a tad firm.” Or, after hearing of lows in the minus 20s, he would casually report, “It might be a touch brisk.”

During the summer months, Peter enjoyed hiking the Long Trail or sailing his Flying Scot. His children might argue that he did more drifting than sailing, as midway into the voyage the fickle wind would inevitably fail, leaving him hopelessly bobbing for hours in the doldrums of Lake Champlain, but he took it in stride. A familiar mantra was, “Don’t worry about things you have no control over.” Which, in actuality, is a lot harder in practice than the aphorism implies, but he made it look easy.

Retirement was no time for slowing down. With all the time in the world, Peter focused on skiing, hiking, kayaking, travel and physical fitness. He also volunteered as a Stowe host for the Stowe Mountain Resort — the funnest job he ever had. A favorite among his coworkers, Peter would greet and regale visitors with a history of the ski area and mountain that they could not find in any guidebook. He also indulged his intellectual pursuits and would take UVM courses on any topic that piqued his interest. He immersed himself in history, philosophy and finance and became a voracious reader of historical biographies. Peter also volunteered his time as a hospice worker and as a board member for HomeShare Vermont. A member of the Lake Mansfield Trout Club for over 30 years, he loved an afternoon hike followed by a terrific meal down at the lodge. With any free time he had left, Peter would navigate the windy backcountry roads — exploring the secret beauty Vermont’s highways and interstates don’t reveal — as he visited every town, village and city for the 251 Club. Peter loved photography and had a wonderful eye for composition and lighting. He also loved art galleries, classical music and operas at the Met, and single malt Scotch whiskey. He was a foodie even before there was such a term and possessed almost a preternatural ability to find (pre-Yelp) a world-class restaurant in any major U.S. city and even Europe.

Peter passed away peacefully on March 29, 2023, at the Arbors in Shelburne, Vt. Although our hearts are heavy, this is not a time for sorrow but of reflection and deep gratitude for a life that was so exceptionally lived. Peter was truly a good and gentle man — an extremely kind, patient, generous and thoughtful man. He was a loving husband and outstanding father to his five children and an adoring grandfather. He dedicated his life to improving and restoring the eyesight of thousands of children in Vermont, New England and even Canada. He lived life decidedly at his own pace, enjoyed it to the fullest and never felt too rushed to drive three hours out of the way for an outstanding meal at a fine restaurant. Even as old age and illness robbed him of his mobility and independence, he would remind us not to feel sorry for him. Throughout, he remained perennially optimistic and hopeful. In summing up Peter’s life … well, perhaps Emerson said it best: “The purpose of life is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.”

Peter’s truly was a life well lived.

Peter is survived by his loving wife, Mary; his five children, Anne (Hauke) and son-in-law David; Kim (Sbabo) and son-in-law David; David and daughter-in-law, Pat; Steven; and James; his grandchildren, Peter (Hauke) and wife Elise, Eric (Hauke), Adam (Hauke), Eva (Sbabo), Caroline, Patrick, and Matthew; great-grandson, Adler (Hauke); and many nieces and nephews. His granddaughter Olivia predeceased him. The family would also like to thank the caregivers from Silver Leaf In-Home Care and Birchwood Terrace, who did much to improve Peter’s quality of life in his final two years.

A celebration of Peter’s life will be held at St. Catherine of Siena Church in Shelburne, Vt., on May 10, at 11 a.m. In lieu of flowers, donations may be made in Peter’s memory to St. Catherine of Siena Church in Shelburne, Vt., or to Children’s Eye Foundation of AAPOS, 1935 County Rd., B2 W Ste. 165, Roseville, MN 55113.

Arrangements have been entrusted to the care of the Ready Funeral & Cremation Service, South Chapel.  To send online condolences to the family, please visit readyfuneral.com.

This article appears in Apr 26 – May 2, 2023.