I swear I’m not making this up.

According to Boston.com and various other media outlets, Etta James publicly threatened to whoop Beyonce Knowles’ ass at a recent concert in Seattle.
The legendary singer was apparently miffed over Knowles’ Inaugural Ball performance of “At Last,” James’ signature tune — though she was hardly the first to sing it. No word on whether Knowles has accepted the challenge. But one would have to figure Vegas would put long odds on the 71 year old James. Although if Danny Bonaduce can box Jose Canseco to a draw, I guess anything’s possible.

Here’s the transcript:
“You guys know your President, right? You know the one with the bigears? Wait a minute, he ain’t my President. He might be yours; he ain’tmy President. You know that woman he had singing for him, singing mysong? She’s going to get her ass whipped.

“The great Beyonce. Ican’t stand Beyonce! She has no business up there, singing up there ona big ol’ President day, singing my song that I’ve been singingforever.”

And here’s the actual audio clip, courtesy of CrownCityMedia.net.

Dan Bolles is a culture coeditor at Seven Days. He joined the paper in 2007 as its music editor, covering Vermont's robust music, comedy and nightlife scenes for a decade before deciding he was too old to be going to the Monkey House on weeknights to see rock shows for a living. He became assistant arts editor in 2017 and culture coeditor in 2021. Bolles has received numerous local and national awards for his writing on Vermont arts, sports and the occasional celebrity canine murder mystery. He loves...