Dear Reverend,
I’m a mother of three adult children, and I love them dearly, but I miss having a baby around. I’ve always dreamed of being a grandmother, but my kids have made it clear that they aren’t going to have any children of their own. I know that’s their decision, but how can I get over my grandbaby fever?
Gran Nah (woman, 58)
Dear Gran Nah,
On behalf of all the childless-by-choice people in the world: Thank you. It’s fantastic that you respect your kids’ decisions and don’t try to harangue them into changing their minds. Trust me, I’ve heard horror stories. Not all moms are as accepting of the situation as you seem to be.
Do other family members or friends have babies or young children that you could “borrow” occasionally? Ask to join that family on an outing now and then. You could also offer babysitting services. Perhaps your children have friends who could use a helping hand with their kids?
If you don’t have any tots in your immediate circle, you could look into picking up a side gig in childcare. That way, you could get your baby fix with the added bonus of a little extra cash. You can sign up on a website like care.com or put out the word on a neighborhood forum, if you have one.
There are also a number of volunteer opportunities that benefit kids. Check with your local hospital to see if it’s looking for help in the pediatric ward. Some hospitals take on volunteer baby cuddlers. Seriously. Google “baby cuddler program near me” and see what pops up.
While you’re at it, look into what it takes to become a foster grandparent. I found local options listed at AmeriCorps, the United Way and Green Mountain Foster Grandparent Program.
Good luck and God bless,
The Reverend
This article appears in May 3-9, 2023.
