Though most people are unfamiliar with the word “aptronym” — and spell-checking programs tend to flag it as an error — we’ve all encountered the phenomenon. An aptronym is a name that all too well suits its bearer’s profession, hobby or other distinguishing characteristic. Years ago, for instance, I had a camp nurse named Sandy Sheets, my uncle had a dentist named Lou Smoler and my mom knew an ophthalmologist named Dr. I. Ball. Our local weatherman was Storm Field, and a nearby veterinarian was named Dr. Barker.

Over the past 12 months, Seven Days staffers have compiled a list of nearly two dozen new aptronyms we chanced on in the course of our reporting. A few, like University of Vermont geographer Austin Remy Troy, aren’t immediately obvious. (All three of his names are geographic places.) Then there are the anti-aptronyms, or names that seem to contradict their bearers’ calling — such as Don Black, the former Ku Klux Klansman who founded the white supremacist website Stormfront.

Got a few good aptronyms of your own? Send them along to ken@sevendaysvt.com.

  • Trevor and Russell Ashe, Barre firefighters

  • Margaret Provost, St. Michael’s College administrator

  • Alan Quackenbush, Vermont wetlands ecologist

  • John T. Coffin, St. Johnsbury funeral director

  • Vern Grubinger, UVM fruit and plant expert

  • Dr. Walter Russell Brain, British neurologist and author of the standard neurological text Brain’s Diseases of the Nervous System

  • Alicia Keys, pianist

  • Birgitte Sloth, obesity and exercise researcher

  • Bill Dolphin, cetacean researcher

  • Christian Smith, sociologist of religion

  • Deb Hitter, walking-stick maker

  • Susun Weed, herbalist

  • Nancy Nipples, owner of a Seattle-area store that sells high-end dairy products

  • Kook Jung, psychiatrist

  • Sue and Gary Butts, owners of “Butts A’Running Bare Race Management,” which organizes clothing-optional runs

  • John Pepper, CEO and co-founder of the Boloco burrito chain

  • Joseph Boardman, Amtrak CEO

  • Kathleen Newland, national refugee advocate

And two anti-aptronyms:

  • Dr. James Clapp, Medical Center Hospital of Vermont OB/GYN

  • Anna Drinkwine, Victory Center Church pastor

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This article appears in Dec 24-30, 2008.

Staff Writer Ken Picard is a senior staff writer at Seven Days. A Long Island, N.Y., native who moved to Vermont from Missoula, Mont., he was hired in 2002 as Seven Days’ first staff writer, to help create a news department. Ken has since won numerous regional and national awards for his features, profiles and investigative stories and had his work picked up by international news outlets. He was the first journalist to shine a light on the thousands of undocumented workers in Vermont’s dairy...