My Fiancée Cheated but Wants Me Back 

click to enlarge

• ID 15951944 © Beaniebeagle | Dreamstime.com

Dear Reverend,

I had a misunderstanding with my fiancée, but we didn't break up. After a few days, I found out she was already cheating on me with another man. She didn't show any sign of remorse for her actions. She told me that she didn't love me anymore and started dating the new guy. Exactly one month later, she started calling to apologize. She said she would never do it again and was willing to do anything to get back together. I still love her and haven't been with another girl since I met her nine years ago. My heart still wants her back, but I feel so betrayed. I'm so confused and don't know what to do.

Burned Bachelor (man, 37)

Dear Burned Bachelor,

I'm curious about the original misunderstanding with your fiancée. Is there any chance she could have thought the two of you actually had broken up? Just playin' devil's advocate, but maybe she believed she was — however quickly — just moving on with her life.

It's also unclear whether she started seeing the other guy a few days after the misunderstanding or had been messing around with him prior. That makes a big difference.

Whatever the case may be, the result is the same: You feel hurt and betrayed, and that stinks.

People often say "Once a cheater, always a cheater," but I know for a fact that's not true. You've known this woman for nearly a decade and are at an age when you've likely been around the block a couple of times. If you truly believe she's being honest with you now and your heart is telling you to give it another shot, I'd say you should listen to it.

If you loved each other enough to get engaged, hopefully you can work through this. But it may be tough on your own; seeking out some couples counseling may be a good idea. If you already chose a wedding date, you may want to bump it out a bit to be sure you're on solid ground before you tie the knot.

Good luck and God bless,

The Reverend